the road goes on forever

sam

Tue, 12 May 2009 04:06:18 GMT

"i've always thought of myself as a cowboy."
"...me too."

by way of a few simple twists of fate, i came to know a boy who turned out to be a near-perfect reflection of myself. and i'm so vain i went and fell in love with him.

summer

Sat, 11 Apr 2009 13:56:44 GMT

the more i think about the logistics of this, the more it needs to happen. summer of my eighteenth year. it's about time i did something spontaneous and risky and romantic and life-changing. i think i'm going to drive across the country.

Mon, 02 Mar 2009 03:56:31 GMT

DOORS

Thu, 19 Feb 2009 13:42:05 GMT

first project for videography class!
the assignment was "a one-minute film about a door."
we didn't know what to do, so we just started filming. this is what happened.
it's kind of awesome.

boy decide

Wed, 11 Feb 2009 04:01:36 GMT

this has been one of my favorite songs for a long time now
but these days the lyrics are hitting a little too close to home

murder by death - boy decide

there's a son, he is born
with a silver spoon in his mouth
go on, boy, admit it
there's got to be something you love
enough to protect
you tire of things, i know,
but you've got to push on

some men crave women,
and some men crave gold
some folks die too young
and some die too old
some just want to pass time with liquor and cards
some work to the top and then some don't get far

boy, decide
you're too old to fuck around
and too young to die
time to try life on for size

now the time has come
to pull yourself out of the mud
and fix yourself up
hell, don't you care how you look?
your mother (god rest her)
she'd spin in her grave if she knew
what a mess you have made

some men crave women,
and some men crave gold
some folks die too young
and some die too old
some just want to pass time with liquor and cards
some work to the top and then some don't get far

boy, decide
you're too old to fuck around
and too young to die
time to try life on for size

you're pissing into the wind
squandering the life you were given
now what will you do?
cause you're wasting away your life
digging a hole you can dive into
when you get tired of fighting...

a softer world #391

Thu, 15 Jan 2009 17:59:52 GMT

http://www.asofterworld.com/

johnny trouble

Sun, 11 Jan 2009 08:17:46 GMT

it's hard to know how to feel when the reasons why you love people are the very same reasons that they can make you feel real sad sometimes
(or maybe i should just start taking the pills again?)
but then, we artsy types are never happier than when we've got some inner turmoil to work with
i've found that bittersweetness is well-accompanied by certain intoxicating beverages
we're underage and overboard and destined for greatness, or alcoholism

"pathos + gin = pathogen?"

a softer world #388

Mon, 05 Jan 2009 02:37:21 GMT

http://www.asofterworld.com/

hahahahaha

Mon, 29 Dec 2008 21:54:33 GMT

this is my horoscope for the week of december 29th:

virgo (Aug. 23rd-Sept. 22nd)
This week, you'll have more energy than a brand new puppy waiting for his walk. And you know how some people are dog people and others would rather piss on a fire hydrant in public than show a canine a little love? Well, the same goes for you: Your crotch-sniffing, drippy tongue act will be a little much for all the wrong people. But there's one special person out there who's going to just love it, and it's gonna be just like that spaghetti scene in The Lady and the Tramp. Ain't puppy love grand? Your New Year's resolution: If you sense a kindred spirit in the room, go straight for the crotch. And stay off the furniture.

aries (Mar. 21st-Apr. 20th)
Oh, this really cracks us up. The stars have a teeny-tiny recommendation for you this week: "Look for someone who can dazzle your mind and challenge your every thought." Yeah, like it's really that easy. No big deal, right? Geez, and all this time we've been chasing dullards with no sex appeal. How come no one told us we should chase the catch of the day? Well, Aries, before you get all cocky like us, stop and think for a second: When was the last time you really went after someone you wanted bad, someone you thought you couldn't get? Are you settling to avoid rejection? Do we sound like your shrink yet? Have you called your mother lately? Your New Year's resolution: Shoot for the moon and maybe you'll end up shagging a little star. And call your mother.

taurus (Apr. 21st-May 20th)
When we look at your week, Taurus, one phrase comes to mind: "Charming the pants off." 'Tis the season for you to be getting boo-tay! And it's not just 'cause everyone's too drunk to care who they get lucky with, we swear. You're sparkling like your jacket is lined with Christmas lights, and everyone's going to be lining up to sit on your knee and whisper what they really want for the holidays in your ear. Turns out Santa didn't put out this year--but on New Year's Eve, you can make up for that. Your New Year's resolution: Let it all flow--the booze, the compliments, the sweet talking. Just let it flow. And carry condoms everywhere.

gemini (May 21st-June 21st)
To paraphrase a line from one of Lo's favorite movies, The Four Seasons: "Your thoughts are like gumballs that just drop down from your brain onto your tongue." To put it less delicately, you've got diarrhea of the mouth when it comes your romantic emotions. Your New Year's resolution: Remove feet from your diet completely. However, you can put a sock in it. Socks are okay.

cancer (June 22nd-July 22nd)
The stars say that "You'll be in the groove and making a move this week." Hey, the stars are a poet and they don't even know it! Your New Year's resolution: Make sure you've got a fabulous party to attend and aren't wasting all that grooviness on dancing with yourself. Oh, oh, oh, dancing with yourself.

leo (July 23rd-Aug. 22nd)
You'll be very popular this week--we're talking Jonah Brothers popular, J. Lo popular, even Chia Pet popular. You just have to get out and mingle. That means going to every New Year's party you were invited to, as well as the one you wish you were invited to. Your New Year's resolution: Party like it's 1999!

libra (Sept. 23rd-Oct. 23rd)
You are wise to question your motives this week when it comes to love: Self-deception is likely. Whoever you are interested in will probably give you a false impression. Love triangles may cause problemos. Your New Year's resolution: Give up geometry. You were never good at math.

scorpio (Oct. 24th-Nov. 22nd)
In Pedro Almodóvar's Talk to Her (his perviest, most disturbing--yet somehow sweet--film), a man is asked, "Are you single?" and he responds, "Yes, I'm alone." Which is kind of how you've been feeling lately: "One is the loneliest number," and all that claptrap that seems so much more depressing when you don't have a date for New Year's Eve. But maybe your attitude isn't helping. You're not alone, you're number one! Your New Year's resolution: When you meet a hottie, focus on flirting, not gut-spilling. Save the woe-is-me for the second date.

sagittarius (Nov. 23rd-Dec. 21st)
Your daisy-petal-picking technique for making important romantic decisions is getting old fast. Your wishy-washy behavior will turn the person you've been hanging out with running in the other direction. Your New Year's resolution: Grow a spine.

capricorn (Dec. 22nd-Jan. 20th)
Don't be so argumentative all the time. It's the holidays--everyone's too stuffed with turkey and eggnog to give a shit about your debate-of-the-week right now. Can't you just drop all the "issues" for a few days and think about getting laid like the rest of us? Your New Year's resolution: Have another glass of wine and stay a while. Have you ever danced on a bar-top? Now is as good a time as any.

aquarius (Jan. 21st-Feb. 18th)
You know those conversations, four gin-and-tonics into the evening, where the words are slightly slurred but the sentiment is completely sincere? When you tell your friend, "I thought you hated me when we first met!" and she replies "I did!" (Truth serum, dude.) Well, you'll be bonding with people like this all week, except you won't need the Dutch courage. It might result in a brand-new friendship, it might result in a lurve connection, and then again, it might result in a punch in the face. But a black eye lasts only a week whereas true wuv is forever (or at least until New Year's Eve)--so isn't it worth the risk? Your New Year's resolution: Just burn the patchouli incense and tell it like it is, man.

pisces (Feb. 19th-Mar. 20th)
We see someone in your past. Our crystal ball is a little on the hazy side (or maybe that's just our hangovers), but it looks like this someone could be an ex. It's definitely someone you're still a little hung up on. Oh wait...the crystal ball is kind of clearing up a little...man, this someone is hot! It's time you resolved your feelings for this someone once and for all. Best-case scenario will be like one of those Meg Ryan vehicles where you finally figure out you were right for each all along, you just needed time, maturity, and a romantic encounter on top of the Empire State Building. Worst-case scenario will be realizing that life isn't like a Meg Ryan vehicle and you still haven't found your one-and-only. And someone in the middle there is the chance that you'll get to have great ex sex. Your New Year's resolution: Look up that one-who-got-away on Facebook.

courtesy of em & lo's sex blog

merry lil christmas

Thu, 25 Dec 2008 01:54:07 GMT

"have yourself a merry little christmas
let your heart be light
from now on our troubles will be out of sight..."

it's christmas eve, and somebody loves you, and everything is going to be okay.
if something's bothering you, whatever it is, let it go.
decide to be happy, and you will be! it's as simple as that!
merry christmas, everybody. have safe.

here are some presents i gathered for you. christmas songs you might not be sick of yet! click to listen, right-click to download.

the knife - christmas reindeer
sufjan stevens - come thou fount of every blessing
the raveonettes - come on santa
the muppets - one more sleep til christmas
the reverend horton heat - santa bring my baby back
otis redding - merry christmas baby
yo la tengo - rock and roll santa
mxpx - christmas night of the living dead
the polyphonic spree - happy christmas (war is over)

this feels better

Tue, 23 Dec 2008 01:01:53 GMT

on being sick: being sick isn't so bad when you catch it from somebody you love. and you don't regret what you was doin' when you caught it.

on love: some people are really hesitant to tell people that they love them. i used to be one of those people. recently though, i've realized that love is awesome, and i have a lot of love for a lot of people, and i'm going to tell them about it. HEY I LOVE YOU :D

on defiance, ohio: i can't stop listening to them, we should listen to them together and sing real loud

on myself: i look a bit like a small antelope that's been whipped around by a lion or something else with powerful jaws. but the antelope is okay with it, because the antelope and the lion are pals. my throat hurts and i'm terribly lightheaded. i've got bruises on my neck and my lips are purple. my neck is sore, probably from having my hair pulled. i haven't showered in a while. and i am so happy. there are things i could be unhappy about, but i am ignoring them. it's fantastic. call me, i want to play. i'll try not to cough on you.

KITTIES

Thu, 11 Dec 2008 04:13:19 GMT

this entry brought to you by the letter: kitty

i hope you feel better now!

A THANKSGIVING CAROL

Thu, 27 Nov 2008 05:40:14 GMT

on the first day of turkey, my true luv gave to meee...

fiiiive rainbow tuurrrrds

four hopping nazis

three purple things

two little girls

and a cat abusing a babyyyy

MERRY THANKSGIVING EV'RYBODY
GOD BLESS US EVERY ONE

P.S. YES MY NEW MOOD THEME IS VAPOREONS WHAT

the strokes

Thu, 06 Nov 2008 23:27:03 GMT

you don't even have to look at their faces to see how cute they are.

halloween

Mon, 03 Nov 2008 18:45:31 GMT

i know it's a lil bit late, but i have a halloween present for you all! i give you...
OLIVIA'S SPOOOKY HALLOWEEN MIXTAPE!

1. humpin' pumpkin - modest mouse
2. call 1-800-FEAR - lali puna
3. animal midnight - stephen malkmus & the jicks
4. skeleton suit - birdmonster
5. my doorbell - white stripes
6. ghosts are good company - bishop allen
7. werewolves of london - warren zevon
8. thriller - ben gibbard
9. same ghost every night - wolf parade
10. candy - lovedrug
11. vampire girls - jesus h. christ & the four hornsmen of the apocalypse
12. fell in love with a zombie - oh no! oh my!
13. such a scream - tom waits
14. vampire/forest fire - the arcade fire
15. these ate the ghosts - the bees
16. the monster mash, of course.

this glorious little mix of righteously spooky music can be downloaded for your listening pleasure here: http://www.mediafire.com/?cymmuyynt1k

Are you dating the very last person you kissed on the lips?
uh... kind of. not really? i'm not sure. it's okay though

Are you keeping a big secret right now?
if i am, i can't remember it

If you had a baby with the last person you texted:
that would be a scientific anomaly

Do you still talk to the person you fell hardest for?
sometimes i try to, but so far he refuses to respond

How do you feel about that?
i'm trying not to

Who was the last 3 people you texted?
janejane, caroline, tay

Do you hate the last person you kissed?
no, that would be dumb.

Do you always answer your phone?
not always, but i'm getting better at it

How long can you go without your phone?
as long as it takes

If your ex said they hate you, you say?
"..."

What would you do if your best friend told you they were moving?
i would hope she was moving into my house

Have you ever fallen asleep in someone's arms?
it is the best ever

Are you any good at math?
that is ridiculous

How did your day go yesterday?
yesterday was pretty alright. i made like six dollars in tips, hooray!

Who was the last person you saw?
mamasan

Was your last missed call from a boy or girl?
joe is a boy

Name something you are doing tomorrow?
vote! and give away free ice cream to other people who voted too

Do you prefer regular or chocolate milk?
chocolate milk reminds me of kindergarten

When was the last time you had starbucks?
coupla days ago

Do you sleep on your stomach?
i always end up that way

Who was the last person that made you cry?
i guess it was bryson

Are you ticklish?
rawther

Do you crack your knuckles?
once in a while

What are your favorite color(s)?
black is classy, red is fun

Ever been on a blind date?
not really

Are you named after anyone?
my uncle, actually

Anything you want to ask someone?
what are we doing tonight?

What is on your bed right now?
pillows, brankets, guitar, kitteh

Who was the last person to give you a hug?
my dad gave me sort of half a hug

Where were you last night at 2am?
reading flannery o'connor in my bed

Who's bothering you right now?
i'm good

Who was the last person that gave their number to you?
dylan just gave me someone else's number...

When was the last time you cleaned your room?
all the time

How many letters are in your last name?
seben

What are you excited about?
eventually not living here anymore

Do you drink bottled water?
i bottle it myself

When was the last time you talked to one of your siblings?
last night

Have you lost friends in the past year?
big time

Who's the last person that made you smile?
wyan

Do you think you have made a difference in anyone's life?
man i sure hope so

Where is your phone?
good question...

Do you go to school currently?
usually

Who are you expecting a call from?
somebody!

When will your next kiss take place?
as soon as possible

How are you feeling right now?
chipper

Do you have any homework to do?
haha, what ever

When was the last time you smiled?
right now

Who was the first person you talked to today?
i emailed ryan, then i talked to my ma

What did you do last Saturday?
drugs

When is the next time you'll hug someone?
every hour on the hour

are you afraid of roller coasters?
yes

Do you wish on 11:11?
when i remember to

Has anyone ever crawled through your window?
yes, usually myself, or my cat

Do you hate the last girl you had a conversation with?
no!

Have you told anybody you loved them today?
not yet

Were you happy when you woke up today?
i was waking up from a really crazy dream, and the clocks changed yesterday, so i was kind of disoriented.

www.fluevog.com

Thu, 23 Oct 2008 03:43:33 GMT

john fluevog makes some pretty badass footwear.

i don't know what it is with girls and shoes but i've definitely got it
i'll take one pair of each, please

this is not okay with me

Thu, 16 Oct 2008 14:02:20 GMT

i usually try to avoid diagnosing myself, but
now that i know that dermatillomania is something that exists, i am convinced that i am afflicted with some form of it

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dermatillomania

the libertine

Mon, 13 Oct 2008 01:46:46 GMT

"Allow me to be frank at the commencement. You will not like me. The gentlemen will be envious and the ladies will be repelled.
You will not like me now and you will like me a good deal less as we go on.
Ladies, an announcement: I am up for it, all the time.
That is not a boast or an opinion; it is bone hard medical fact.
I put it round you know.
And you will watch me putting it round and sigh for it.
Don't.
It is a deal of trouble for you and you are better off watching and drawing your conclusions from a distance than you would be if I got my tarse up your petticoats.
Gentlemen. Do not despair; I am up for that as well.
And the same warning applies.
Still your cheesy erections till I have had my say.
But later when you shag - and later you will shag, I shall expect it of you and I will know if you have let me down - I wish you to shag with my homuncular image rattling in your gonads.
Feel how it was for me, how it is for me and ponder,
'Was that shudder the same shudder he sensed?
Did he know something more profound?
Or is there some wall of wretchedness that we all batter with our heads at that shining, livelong moment?'
That is it.
That is my prologue, nothing in rhyme, no protestations of modesty; you were not expecting that I hope.
I am John Wilmot, Second Earl of Rochester and I do not want you to like me."

- The Libertine

DEEP WAVES OF CLAM HONEY BREAKING AGAINST THE COLD STEEL OF CIVILIZATION

Fri, 10 Oct 2008 17:20:08 GMT

"Get thee back to the aroma of birth...for the smells of the female body, the smells you have sought to kill with your totalitarian chemicals, are the very smells of birth, the strong odors of the essence of existence. The nose that is offended by the hot perfume of the cunt is a nose unsuited for this world, and should be sniffing gold on the scrubbed streets of Heaven. The vagina reeks of life and love and the infinite et cetera. O vagina! Your salty incense, your mushroom moon musk, your deep waves of clam honey breaking against the cold steel of civilization: vagina, draw our noses to the grindstone of ecstasy, and let us die smelling as we did when we were born!"

-tom robbins, even cowgirls get the blues

Wed, 08 Oct 2008 00:22:22 GMT

existential-euphoria.blogspot.com

blog update

Sun, 28 Sep 2008 16:02:38 GMT

hits are not rising

i am a sad hamster

artless candor

Sat, 27 Sep 2008 13:09:27 GMT

so i've been doing this poetry project for a little while
i haven't really publicized it because i'm wary of how some people will react
but i'm kind of tired of posting and knowing that only maybe two people will read it
so here i am tentatively telling you all about it

http://artless-candor.blogspot.com

vitamins

Thu, 25 Sep 2008 02:17:31 GMT

so i started taking some vitamins
i actually think they are making me feel better
but they are also making me piss neon
which is kind of unsettling

shit day

Tue, 16 Sep 2008 22:20:42 GMT

i stayed up too late and overslept
now i am home alone
feeling some hard heartbreak relapse
haven't taken my medicine in like three days
it's raining like a motherfucker
i just spent US$60.80 on three bags of groceries
this day was doomed from the start

chex mix, however, is delicious
this american life is good
and my cat is adorable

saint olivia

Sun, 07 Sep 2008 17:20:24 GMT

"Saint Olivia is the patron saint of music. The beautiful daughter of a noble Sicilian family, at 13 years old she was kidnapped by Muslims and taken as a slave to Tunis. Impressed by her virtue and beauty her abductors permitted her to live as a hermitess in a cave. However, after she began to perform miracle cures on the local sick, many Muslims converted to Christianity. Consequently she was imprisoned, tortured and later killed."